Humor: sexy.

When women say they’re attracted to men who can make them laugh, they’re telling the truth. This statement is within the small intersection of what is true about female sexual preference and what is socially acceptable. So women feel good saying this.

Humor is attractive because it is a demonstration of a good life, of control, and of social power and dominance over her and other people. Humor, like a tickle attack among lovers or siblings, is very dominant, but in a positive and socially acceptable way.

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11 Responses to “Humor: sexy.”

  1. Doug1 Says:

    I don’t think I’ve ever heard the attractive power men who can be reliably humorous have over women, so simply and keenly expressed. Well done.

  2. Poetry of Flesh Says:

    Hrm. There’s more than one kind of humor, some are certainly unattractive. Michael Sera, beta-bitch, awkward humor. Not exactly a sign of power. Zach Galifianakis, “hello, I’m a total loser”. Not attractive.

    Sure, both of them are successful, financially and socially. And, yes, both have fan clubs of women who want to do horrific sexual things to them… but from the women I know who have interest in either of them, it’s not quite sexual. Especially with Sera.

    Not saying that I do not find humor attractive– a razor wit… mrowr– but not all humor is attractive.

    • stagetwo Says:

      my guess is that cera will do alright, thanks to fame + humor, plus strong identity and (perhaps) actually being an interesting person. and he might learn some game. but he might be doing damage to young guys who don’t have fame in the mix with his example. his persona and roles in effect promises that you can appeal to attractive girls (as in “infite playlist”) with this schtick: selling the lie.

      zach galifianakis has a lot of personality and a very original humor. i saw him live once in montreal. again with fame in the mix, he might carve out his own niche.

  3. Doug1 Says:

    Poetry and Stage Two, I hope you’ll both comment on the two or three comments I left on Stage Two’s not ancient August thread entitled “You Like a Slut?”.

  4. Doug1 Says:

    *now ancient

  5. Doug1 Says:

    As for what makes a girl good in bed, I think it can be usually thought of as falling into these three categories:

    1) Her beauty or hotness and youthful appeal, most of all in her face but also in her figure, which is a three dimensional, animated quality, not fully captured by a static picture from one angle. Makeup, hair styling and clothing styling all contribute to this, but raw physical beauty, youth (once past 16 anyway) and figure contribute by far the most. Though this is a very important and overall the leading component, it’s not everything as Roissy sometimes claims.

    2) Her sexual hunger and emotional responsiveness, i.e. her passion. Inhibitions, shyness and inexperience (with really good sex, or any at all) can mask this, but can also almost always be dissolved by a skillful and patient male lover. Once dissolved, inhibitions etc. are gone for good for the lover in question. Her prior experience of them, but not with him, will also tend to make her more loyal to him. Girls who can reasonably be described as sluts among those who use the word just about never still have an inhibition issue, though sometimes (though rarely I think) they do remain shy.

    3) Her wired and hormonally determined sexual responsiveness. This is most simply thought of as how easily (and whether) she can have an orgasm from intercourse alone – and all he emotional buildup and attraction to him which preceded it. Note for many women this will heavily depend on how attracted she is to her lover, and whether she is in fact in love with him (goes to trust and willingness to let go enough or fully “surrender” for many girls), and/or how much “in lust” she is with him. However some girls simply aren’t wired such that they can have an orgasm from penis in vagina plus emotions alone it seems. Others can sometimes but usually need some direct clitoral stimulation by herself or him beforehand. Others can really only come from clitoral stimulation alone. Others still seem not to be able to come at all, or only after really prolonged clitoral sessions, or once in a blue moon more quickly. It’s hard to tease all this apart from how attracted the girl is to her partner, regardless of what she says or wants to believe. However I’m utterly convinced that despite what women’s empowerment and male blaming advocates want to have men believe, there’s wide variation among women in this regard. Net net, it’s real easy for any decent lover she’s at all attracted to, to get some girls off hard, and damn difficult for sold alphas to get others genuinely off even with lots of effort. Fairly easy to get off girls are a lot more fun. Sorry, just the way it is — seems to me anyway.

  6. Doug1 Says:

    These are I think my final thoughts on girls that can reasonably be called sluts (for now). By the way I often tend to really like sluts, at least if they’re not the real hardened variety (as you Poetry it seems obvious to me are not). I remember some friends with benefits I’ve had with real fondness. Great, fun girls.

    One might, and feminist women generally do, ask something like “even if this is somewhat true about girls, doesn’t the same thing apply to guys?”

    Even if we don’t accept that guys and girls are necessarily the same on average especially in emotionally and sexually related areas, it’s still a fair question. Aren’t there some parallels.

    In a nutshell my response is only a little. I’ll take myself for comparison. First of all I’ve got Poetry’s numbers beat, but I’m also a whole lot older than she is. I didn’t at her age, but was up there then too.

    It’s true as to whether guys can fall into what’s often described as “puppy love”. I’ve been in puppy love only twice. The first time and in some ways the strongest was right after I lost (managed to “lose”) my virginity when I was 18 with an 18yo girl headed to college, but pretending to be 17 and headed off to an Ivy League college, at a small summer island beach community. I say in “some ways“ because the girl didn’t full return the giddiness of it, although she was fond of me and we stayed a couple for the duration of the summer. I immediately realized it would blow everything if I didn’t cover it up, suppress it, and act cool, so I did. After all I was 18 and experienced, right? In covering it up and suppressing it, I also soon lost a lot of it. The second time was my first real love affair, again in the summer but back in my hometown, when I was 17 and my girlfriend was 16. She’d newly moved up north from Georgia with her mother, right after her mother’s divorce from her rather rich father. This time it was returned, but not quite as much – she it turned out had had quite a reputation in her home town down south. She pretty quickly confessed all this to me — we fell for each other very quickly and hard, and I’m pretty good at this sort of thing. She probably fell for me as much as or even more than I did with her at first; she was a very passionate, hot blooded and impulsive girl. (Yuum.)

    However, I also pretty quickly realized that this was potentially a quite perilous situation. Especially since we were both going of to return to boarding schools in the fall. She remained my girl friend through the following spring, when I went off to work on an coastwise west coast oil tanker before starting at a N. California college in the fall. I also eventually got out of her, when we met up for a while and became fuck buddies a year or so later that she did cheat on me some that year while we were separated but writing torrid love letters back and forth, but didn’t fall “out of love with me”, she said, until we parted probably for good as I head off to the west coast and college.

    Anyway, I’ve been “in love” a good number of times since, but have never since fallen deeply and almost irresistibly in love. It’s always been a decision since, coupled with strong attraction, and always since preceded by the girl having fallen in love with me first. By this last I mean her having actually “fallen” in love, rather than deciding to love me, at least in good part.

    In my opinion “puppy love” is not part of any alpha male’s repertory. It makes men less rather than more attractive to hot women, whatever they may dream up in their imaginations, or like to read or see movies about. It’s often or usually part of an alpha’s past though, or at least that of the feeling rather than hard sort of alpha, as most are in part. Most women want some softer core to attach to.

    In contrast, just about all men however are thrilled when a girl the want for a ltr or marriage falls into deep “puppy love”, or the functional equivalent but for her age, with them. This derives I’m convinced from the fact that whatever their beliefs on the subject, almost all women are most sexually thrilled by strongly sexually dominant men (though many varieties of them may often be challenging to live with day to day); whereas most men, including most alpha men, may want some feistiness to their girl, they also want her to be able to and want to ultimately, and without enormous effort, surrender to him. Love is hottest when the girl feels it at least a bit more strongly, for BOTH the man and the woman.

    That I think goes a long way to explain why a long sexual past is much more problematic in girls for durable long term relationships than it is for men. When we add our feminist culture’s encouragement of women to follow their hearts in marriage and whether to remain in a marriage, while it simultaneously works overtime to shame husbands into remaining responsible, loyal to their wives even while they age (and become less attractive and the same old same old), and ridicule them if the think about leaving wives for “some young bimbo” (she’s a bimbo is this mode of thinking almost automatically for being significantly younger). You put the two together 1) our culture’s encouraging wives to follow their emotions rather than sense of loyalty or honor as it stresses for husbands in deciding whether to remain in a marriage, and 2) the greater wired in need or anyway desire of women to feel a submissive longing for their lover as compared to a husband’s lesser need to feel that longing to want to have sex with or remain with his wife at all (as opposed to wanting to supplement her perhaps), and I think we’ve gone a long way towards explaining why lots of sexual partners in a woman’s past is far more problematic for her remaining happily in a marriage than it is for men to do so.

  7. Doug1 Says:

    To sum up the whole immediately preceding comment:

    Men want women they want to remain with for a long time or forever to be “hopeless in love” with them. They usually can’t get that from a girl beyond her teens or early twenties, or with any experience, but they usually want as close to that as they can get — whatever they say or believe. (In other words, if it happens, they’re almost always thrilled.)

    Women, despite lots of literature and movies and beliefs to the contrary, usually don’t want a man to be hopeless in love with them. Oh at first they might, and they want their man to love them. Just not in hopeless, lead around, kind of way. In a strong, leading, but deeply loyal way.

    This is I think a basic and nearly universal sex difference, aside from the small, small minority of men who lust after sexually dominant women as their main course, and even smaller number of women who want to sexually dominant over the partner as their only course.

  8. Doug1 Says:

    Sorry, thought I was adding the last several to the slut thread.
    Guess it doesn’t make much difference though.

  9. stagetwo Says:

    doug, these are very interesting thoughts. and i agree by and large. i definitely wouldn’t consider offering sexual exclusivity to a woman who doesn’t even appear to be totally in love with me.

  10. Poetry of Flesh Says:

    I’m going to be responding in my blog… once I finish the post. Christmas holidays can be a bit consuming.

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